Head to any college or high school party these days and you may be surprised to see kids chugging their drinks out of, what appears to be, a plastic, pink flamingo. Known as “flabongos”, these beer bongs made out of lawn ornaments are being used across the country to help young people imbibe as much alcohol as they can in a short period of time. These new drinking aides are taking the internet by storm. You can find thousands of pictures on Facebook or other social media sites of college aged kids sticking the beak of a plastic flamingo in their mouths and pouring alcohol down their throats. This new product is making getting uncontrollably drunk easier and more fluorescent than ever.
Those who use the product, and who are enthusiasts of binge drinking, say that flabongos have a few, distinct advantages that a garden hose or regular funnel do not. Unlike a regular beer bong, you can use a flabongo all by yourself because it is made of hard plastic. Also, a flabongo can hold up to 40 ounces of liquid, meaning it does not take many rounds of “bongos” to get fairly smashed. College kids are ingenious when it comes to creative and cheap ways to drink booze or do drugs, and they just might have reached the pinnacle of their creativity with these dastardly, avian chalices.
Young people always want to be in on the ground floor of something that is new and exciting. Chances are, if a kid goes to a party on campus and sees a bunch of their friends chugging and having a great time with a pink flamingo bong, they are going to want to partake. No one wants to be the person at the party that hasn’t tried the flabongo yet. While it does seem to be a bit effeminate on the surface, even the manliest of college jocks can’t scoff at the notion of downing three beers in one pour. It appears the flabongo is a trend that is here to stay for a while.
Obviously, there are incredible amounts of damaging effects that can befall a person that chooses to suck drinks out of a lawn ornament all evening long. This is especially true when it is young people, who are not accustomed to drinking in such large quantities when they first get on college campuses. Peer pressure is a very real threat to incoming freshmen, and the prospect of being the “nerd” that doesn’t partake in the latest drinking trend is often too much for young people to bear. However, if they are properly educated on the dangers of binge drinking before they get to school, they may be less likely to think it’s a great idea to chug out of a plastic bird until they pass out which will keep hopefully keep them out of inpatient alcohol treatment.